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Author Topic: ENIGMA forums are dead again  (Read 4925 times)
Offline (Unknown gender) luiscubal
Posted on: September 24, 2011, 03:34:56 PM
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This is merely a parody.
All characters appearing in this work are fictitious. Any resemblance to real persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.


It happens once in a while, people stop posting, and then nothing happens.
So, now, this is the time when Josh comes along and posts an Announcement with a title like "Totally New Stuff".
But since he's taking a while(maybe it's the curse. I mentioned Aurora a while back and this might have killed ENIGMA), I figured I'd save him the trouble and do it myself.

Quote
[insert troll/obscure reference greeting here]

I know I haven't posted in a while, but that's because I was busy rewriting the parser again. It now handles stuff like "int x; = 2; 3" which turns out to be valid GML. It also serves coffee to the user, just not Java coffee, because Java sucks.
The new parser is much better than the old one, although it causes about 20 regressions.
I was also working in implementing user events, but those don't work because IsmAvatar refuses to be my slave. She claims she has a life besides LGM. *BLASPHEMY*
I also managed to get a new LGM option to improve compatibility with GM. It says "Be slow". Because GM is so slow ROFLCOPTER, and being fast breaks compatibility with some GM games. So this option injects a sleep() every 20 statements, to keep things balanced. But it's not just any sleep. It's a C++ sleep. Yeah! Damn straight.
Also, Windows 8 is retarded.

[insert random see you later note here]

Then Rusky comes along and posts
Quote
If you used decent parsers and LLVM, you wouldn't have to keep rewriting the parser. It'd be perfect and flawless in the first try.

Then an ENIGMA fanboy a honorable gentleman comes along and says something like
Quote
LLVM sucks! It's interpreted and JIT compiled, so it's slower than C++. Everybody knows GCC is the best thing ever. Except GCJ. GCJ sucks.

Then Josh replies to Rusky
Quote
My goal is to create a simple and powerful non-garbage collected C++ environment, and LLVM pollutes that idea. I can add Clang to the config later, but having ENIGMA directly emit LLVM opcodes? No way, it pollutes my idea of a perfect world.

IsmAvatar comes in and comments
Quote
You do know the code is open-source and you could patch it yourself, right?

Josh replies
Quote
I'm allergic to Java. Even using a computer with Java installed makes me itchy.
I once wrote a Java Hello World program and had to stay in the hospital for one whole week.

Then a noob an early adopter comes in:
Quote
I tried to compile a simple game but it gives me an error:
Code: [Select]
GCC error 1: Make love not war
What does this even mean?

Josh:
Quote
Are you using the very latest SVN revision?
What are the contents of your platform.ini file?

Early adopter:
Quote
I'm using revision XYZ.
Here's my file:
Code: [Select]
(Contents of platform.ini here)

Josh:
Quote
I'll look into it.
But meanwhile you can use revision ABC.

Me:
Quote
The next C# will have async. Will ENIGMA also add something like that in a future version?

Josh:
Quote
Are you MAD? I haven't even got C++0x lambdas to work.

Me:
Quote
Quote
Are you MAD?
Possibly.

(insert 3 more pages of essentially the same)

Then a few more topics come along, and after a while the forums die again.

And then Josh posts a new announcement. And it all starts all over again. A never ending cycle.
I wonder if it keeps going on forever or if it ever reaches a stack overflow...

That's it. Nothing else to see here. Move along.
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Offline (Male) Josh @ Dreamland
Reply #1 Posted on: September 24, 2011, 08:31:15 PM

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Ah, luis. You have no idea just how right you are. Only this time, it's different. This time, Rusky has won me over. The parser will be redone using recursive descent taking input from Clang on available types and functions. If I succeed in its rewrite.

Also, as I stated in one other topic, I began work on an HTML5 version of ENIGMA. It lost my attention within a week, though, as I had to move into a new apartment for classes this quarter.

I should say that this is done only after careful consideration, weighing the overhead from clang against the benefit of a reliable coercer. Besides, having the experience of writing ENIGMA once or twice under my belt, I should be able to do it without much problem provided only that Clang's API is sufficient.

And no, this is not a joke.
« Last Edit: September 24, 2011, 08:34:36 PM by Josh @ Dreamland » Logged
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Offline (Female) IsmAvatar
Reply #2 Posted on: September 24, 2011, 08:41:20 PM

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Also, EGM.
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Offline (Unknown gender) daz
Reply #3 Posted on: September 24, 2011, 11:36:10 PM
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Also, wait what? Guess I won't be writing anything with ENIGMA for a while then.
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Offline (Unknown gender) Game_boy
Reply #5 Posted on: September 26, 2011, 02:56:55 PM
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You missed the part of each thread where Josh says he'll rewrite something major from scratch.

Luckily Josh added that bit.

Also wow has it been 3.5 years since a working version of Enigma was 'coming soon'.
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Offline (Male) Josh @ Dreamland
Reply #7 Posted on: September 27, 2011, 10:24:49 AM

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Game_Boy: ENIGMA works. It just doesn't do all of Game Maker.
Even in its current state it provides everything needed to implement the remaining GM functionality. I just assumed there would be more interest in aiding the project's development than there has actually ever proven to be.

Anyway, I haven't started recoding the parser yet, and may not for a while, as our present system has proven sufficient. It's also a large commitment to switch to Clang. In the meantime I've been correcting some bugs.
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"That is the single most cryptic piece of code I have ever seen." -Master PobbleWobble
"I disapprove of what you say, but I will defend to the death your right to say it." -Evelyn Beatrice Hall, Friends of Voltaire
Offline (Male) retep998
Reply #8 Posted on: October 25, 2011, 09:50:11 PM

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Hi, I'm retep998 from a loooong time ago, and I approve of this thread.
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Post made October 27, 2011, 08:12:59 AM was deleted at the author's request.
Offline (Unknown gender) Grundoko
Reply #10 Posted on: November 01, 2011, 07:11:36 PM
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Hi, I'm Grundoko from a loooooooooooonger time ago, and I approve of this thread.
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Offline (Unknown gender) Darkstar2
Reply #11 Posted on: March 15, 2014, 03:24:48 PM
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Quote
I also managed to get a new LGM option to improve compatibility with GM. It says "Be slow". Because GM is so slow ROFLCOPTER, and being fast breaks compatibility with some GM games. So this option injects a sleep() every 20 statements, to keep things balanced. But it's not just any sleep. It's a C++ sleep. Yeah! Damn straight.
Also, Windows 8 is retarded.

That made my otherwise boring day  LMAO.
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Offline (Male) polygone
Reply #12 Posted on: March 20, 2014, 04:48:52 AM

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I am Lord of the Underworld.
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I honestly don't know wtf I'm talking about but hopefully I can muddle my way through.
Offline (Unknown gender) The 11th plague of Egypt
Reply #13 Posted on: March 26, 2014, 02:08:41 PM
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Quote
[insert troll/obscure reference greeting here]

I know I haven't posted in a while, but that's because I was busy rewriting the parser again. It now handles stuff like "int x; = 2; 3" which turns out to be valid GML. It also serves coffee to the user, just not Java coffee, because Java sucks.
The new parser is much better than the old one, although it causes about 20 regressions.
I was also working in implementing user events, but those don't work because IsmAvatar refuses to be my slave. She claims she has a life besides LGM. *BLASPHEMY*
I also managed to get a new LGM option to improve compatibility with GM. It says "Be slow". Because GM is so slow ROFLCOPTER, and being fast breaks compatibility with some GM games. So this option injects a sleep() every 20 statements, to keep things balanced. But it's not just any sleep. It's a C++ sleep. Yeah! Damn straight.
Also, Windows 8 is retarded.

[insert random see you later note here]
Epic :D
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Offline (Unknown gender) Darkstar2
Reply #14 Posted on: March 26, 2014, 03:38:51 PM
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Yeah I agree, whenever I have a shitty day, I refer to this post it cheers me back up and lifts my spirits and laughter :D

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